Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Je Suis Gabby


I've been muzzled, dahrlings, more than once.

When you gab a lot, you live on the edge of nasty reprisals, lost ad dollars, spurned men, miffed readers (you may notice I never mention God or Jesus anymore. Those people scare me more than having to fly coach the rest of my life). Until recently, it all seemed a tad risqué.

But being shot? Strikes me a titch overreactive, wouldn't you say? Heavily armed assassins of men with pencils are a touchy lot.

[Apparently Sarah Palin has been asking why Muslims hate Charlie Brown.]

You really have to be careful what you say.

And why do budding male dentists hate women? Bite me, you misogynist tooth fairies.

I will admit this country has its problems, Pumpkins, but we go to work in relative safety and the best way to honour the men and women at Charlie Hebdo, the thousands in Nigeria, in Syria, in South Sudan, is to savour that freedom.





(will not be published)