In the time it takes for a corporate air travel RFP to grind its way
through the machine, a human life can be conceived (34 seconds), gestated (40
weeks) and delivered! That’s way too freakin’ long pumpkins. But, that’s what
Solutions Group says a corporate air deal takes to process - 9 months or
more. Holy paper-pushing Pumpkins!
CWT and DL have come to the rescue with help from the white knight of
the digital age – an algorithm. Don’t ask me Pumpkins: I once knew an Aldo with
the raunchy rhythm of a Roman waiter, but the algorithm method is Greek to me
(Persian to be precise). But if math can save the world without me breaking a
nail, then maybe there’s something to this big data, Boolean bot binary BS the
beanie-heads blather about.
And what’s with DL so blue skying it these days? They’re also using
their data in a decidedly un-airline way. They are promising
to compensate their corporate account darlings financially should their
operational performance fall below that of its top competitors. They’re even
working to ensure their favourite biz flyers get preferential treatment in case
of delay or cancellation.
Hearing this shocking news, one of our darling and normally demure
dinkettes got herself into a total tizzy shouting she’s “so overwhelmed by bullshit
unwieldy processes and shit technology” that she wants to give DL a big smooch
on the nose cone.