Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Is There A Face On Board?

Jennifer Aniston

Emirates just announced that Jennifer Aniston is to be their ‘face’. I would have picked a better body part, Pumpkins. Airlines have had many mascots over the years, but never a chin. (Apparently Reese Witherspoon’s was unavailable for a mere $5 million deal.)

Mind you, the jaws on the Open Jaw dinkettes here are big enough to park a cargo container on. Those really are big old girls.

Point is, the Friends’ facial endorsement is on the heels of Nicole Kidman signing on to shill for Etihad. It’s like an Abu Dhabi vs Dubai aging super chick fight. Hollywood's own selling for the Arabs must really be pissing off U.S. carriers who want nothing more than to take a bite out of the UAE's oil fed airline subsidies. 

But never mind all that, Pumpkins, Super Carrier Air Canada – ‘more profitable than a speeding Dreamliner’ – will show’em how it’s done when they launch into DBX. I’m seriously considering the offer of being their body parts, dahrlings. Do with my face what you will, Calin! As long as it’s on the lie flat extendo seat. 

(will not be published)